It took us over two years before we conceived our oldest daughter, and after all the trauma we experienced in those two years, I just remember the complete shock I was in when I saw those two lines show up on a positive pregnancy test. I had tested so many times, only seeing one line, or just a faint second line that would disappear in the days or weeks following.
I almost passed out, slumping against the bathroom wall to regain clear vision. I was outside of my own body, and then suddenly my heart was pounding. It had
never pounded so hard. It felt like it was reaching outside of my chest. I had never had such trouble finding words to speak as I walked back in to our bedroom to wake my sleeping husband at 5:30am to tell him he was going to be a Daddy.
I truly believe that my experience as her mother, and the love I have for her runs so deeply and intensely because of how desperately I had longed for her to be in my life. I had never wanted anything so much, and been deprived of it so cruelly. There’s not a day that goes by I’m not grateful for the immense gift she has given me with her life. I cherish every hug, mischievous smile, snuggle, and story that she tells me. My life would feel so empty without her in it. I want to remember all of these different versions of her forever.
I believe in creating photographs that keep faded memories alive. I know you’re here because your babies are growing faster than you’re ready for them to, and while you wish you could keep them just the way they are for a little bit longer, you know that you can’t.
I know, because I’m that mama too. You’re looking for someone to help you capture them just as they are right now. Small, wild, carefree, laughing hysterically at the most mundane things, teary eyed because their feelings are bigger than they are, and gazing at you like you’re their whole world. Because right now, you are their whole world.
This really is my favorite thing in the world. It’s hard, but every hard moment is worth seeing my daughter’s eyes light up as she runs to hug me when I enter a room. She’s taught me so much about myself, granted me joy, newly found strength, confidence, and skills. She’s the light of my life. I can’t imagine a world without her now.
Ever have a bad day, but you get home and your dog is just beyond thrilled that you’re just existing? My dogs are my first babies. They are so loyal, and give me all the warm and fuzzy feelings. But not just my dogs, I love your dogs too.
Nature keeps me grounded, and makes me feel alive. The mountains are my church. I love hiking in the summer and fall. Nature inspires my work in many ways too. I love the changing of the seasons, and find new ways to romanticize the season I’m in. I’ve honestly never been a fan of the winter, so I look for ways to love it, like switching out my home decor, having my own little hygge ritual that includes tea and sometimes a little sweet treat like a muffin, cookie, or slice of cake in the afternoon to perk myself up. I even swap out my daughter’s books seasonally. I’ll settle for winter, because it means I get fall. Fall is my favorite, and without winter, there would be no fall.
I was raised in a family with an identity. The McKenzie Clan. The “M” Team. Our roots originate in Scotland and Sweden. My family is big on integrity, and always doing the right thing, We’re also big on HOLIDAYS. I grew up with so many Christmas traditions, and many of those traditions I’ve been keeping alive in my own family. It’s so much fun to share my childhood and get to relive it in many ways as my daughter grows up. My favorite tradition is cooking Swedish Pancakes with my Mom for Christmas Eve dinner. Lingonberries. YUM.
When I die, I want everyone to talk about how much I loved my family. I don’t care if they
remember what I achieved. I want them to say “Ashley loved her family more than anything else in life. She always made time to be with them. She was always bragging about how great her husband was, and how proud she was of her kids.” We only get this life one time. They’re my everything. Family is forever.
Mama, papa, I see you. I know your time is captivated by your littles runny noses, reheating your coffee for the fourth time, and calming your child's biggest feelings. That's why I've made scheduling your family session as seamless and carefree as humanly possible.